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Beachcomber
5199 E. Pacific Coast Hwy. #608
Post Office Box 15679
Long Beach California, 90815-0679
Phone: (562) 597-8000
Fax: (562) 597-9410
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Beachcombing

From Issue: Volume XXI - Number 5
3/8/2013


Molly Beeler

Given how busy the Master is these days counting the “Best of Long Beach” ballots with the office interns and that he’s on call for jury duty, I’ve been given the rare task of filling in.

He was really hoping to get called into the courthouse if only to get the opportunity to pick a bone with Judge Jesse Rodriguez regarding his area of ignorance, Penal Code 409.5(d): “Nothing in this section shall prevent a duly authorized representative of any news service, newspaper, or radio or television station or network from entering the areas closed pursuant to this section.” [natural disasters, accidents, fires, etc.]

Rodriquez needs that micro-chipped under his skin, given that he blatantly ignores the law, allows dirty cops to lie under oath and had his head so far up former corrupt city prosecutor Tom Reeve’s posterior that he couldn’t see straight.

Rumor has it that the dirty cop – Matthew Gjersvold – got re-arrested for four more felonies in recent weeks in Riverside County and has been in the doghouse ever since. Undoubtedly he is headed back to obedience school for a few more years. With multiple felonies committed as a cop and afterward, he’s been the LBPD’s answer to LA’s bad cop, Christopher Dorner, who recently participated in a televised weenie roast.


Doubtful Judge Rodriguez will get his dog and pony show together before the new courthouse opens across the street in September, named after my pal, “Duke” Deukmejian. Previews of the facility bode well for future jurists and Duke told Rotarians last week he found out there are no plans for his crypt to be located in the facility’s basement!

I’m taking Beggin Bit wagers that any construction relating to the Port of Long Beach HQ or the various Civic Center buildings will take place in phases, starting where the current courthouse resides.


Speaking of “Best of Long Beach,” Master was bemused by a few organizations that sent in nearly 200 ballots with only one or two votes (minimum participation requires votes in 15 categories). Those were all voided and one can only imagine the number of wasted people hours trying to cheat the system.

With the July 2013 ballots for Dining, Arts & Entertainment and Retail businesses my Master plans to require that each ballot be the original form printed in the newspaper and mailed in a separate envelope. That should put a stop to the ballot stuffers and help the US Postal Service survive.

As for the good old USPS, my favorite thing to do these days is to sneak out of the house on Saturday afternoons to greet the postman. I just don’t understand why he avoids delivering mail to our house when I do that. I really do like him in spite of my wildly barked greetings each day when he rattles the mail slot.


The Mistress of the house is enjoying her retirement while keeping me and finicky cat Simon company every day. Saturday was the Mistresses’ birthday and granddaughter Lyla visited from Indio with her parents in tow. The Mistress got a new digital video camera for her birthday to record Lyla’s first steps and I made a point of mugging for the movie as well.

Master thought it would be a good idea for this and future grandchildren to see and hear their ancestors after they’ve gone to the “big doghouse in the sky.” The chunky videotape thingy is now outta here.

This morning I heard the Mistress telling the Master there’s a good probability for the 2016 presidential campaign to be waged between Jeb Bush and Hillary Clinton.

Yeah, I’m thinking to myself, and if she wins there’s a good probability that there will be a White House intern named Marcus Lewinsky. ARF!